Yes.. I survived e A's--barely.. To sum it up: the A's have been TERRIBLE for me.. Received my 1st shock during e maths paper 1.. then became IMMUNE to the rest. Not gg to talk abt tt anymore. Last paper was on 20 Nov, yesterday.
Dun know why. Nowsaday, i just feel so lost. Feel as if a part of me have died. I am just not me anymore. Perhaps, this 2 yrs have really taken a tow on me, that i hv lost part of mysf. I feel so tired & miserable at times. It's really killing me. Made up my mind FINALLY yesterday-- i am going to follow my heart from now on. For 2 yrs, i used my HEAD, now it's time for the HEART. hopefully, this will make me whole again.. i pray..
Alrite, an update. The exams are over, for 1 day, & my parents are already pressing me to find a job. Sms yuzong today & found out to my surprise (horror) that he has already started working. I am super reluctant to work but my parents hv already threatened to NOT give me ANY allowance at all. Nearly FAINT right on the top.. I actually hv no interests to work at all. Cos if u calculate, S'pore OFFICIAL retirement age is 62, but many hv to continue for a living/pay their debts, so if my calculations are CORRECT, a person (assuming graduate from Uni) will hv to work an average of 40 YEARS.. hello.. tt's VERIIIIIIIIIIIIIII long ok.. tt's y i dun wan to work. Can u imagine working for more than 1/2 your life+study for 1/4 and we sleep away an average of 1/12 of our life. OMG.. hv we LIVED at all??!!!
To me, at this point, i just want to do some of my own stuff.. fulfill some dreams & ambitions.. YES.. i do hv those goals that i want to meet!!! but my dad woke me up from my FANTASY dream.. he says that it's time for me to help out & start playing a role to support the family.. **shock..gasp..realisation..
Guess it's true in some sense. But as those words sink in, my heart sink along with it. hai. who says life is a dream.. nightmare more likely..
Whatever.. life moves on. so, i rushed to complete a job application today. finished within 45 mins. cos dateline is TML.. dun tink i stand a chance bah.. nowsaday economy so bad.. sure hv a lot of pple apply wan.. Ah well.. let's wait & see then.. who knows.. mayb lady LUCK may be finally shining on me this year.. haven hv her around for ages.. i feel..
Things to look forward to include: CHRISTMAS PARTY!!! woooo... shld b quite fun bah.. hopefully, i will lossen up by tt time.. yup.. sad though.. NO CLASS CHALET again.. hai.. pathetic in a sense.. anyway, kinda of expected it. Dun tink there will be class outing too. even if there is, attendance will most likely be miserable.. as always.. hai..
Will post some pictures & video the next time.. i hope.. phone cable not working this time. dun know why. Hopefully, e next post will be more CHEERFUL bah.. sorry if this dull feeling is CONTAGIOUS.. dun mean to spread.. haha..
Hope is the last thing that man possess. Don't loss it.
